Someone smart once famously said that;
'The way we do one thing is the way we do everything’
Our relationship with food can therefore be a mirror into the way that we’re living our lives.
It can tell us whether we’re constantly on the run or whether we allow time and space for pleasure. It can inform us about how present we are in our lives or whether we’re constantly seeking distraction. It can reveal how we’re speaking to ourselves and whether we’re kind or judgmental. Some people may realise that they don’t even know what they like or what their needs are, as they have been listening to external voices and advice for their whole life.
While my relationship with food is now simple, free and intuitive, I think it’s interesting to see how some other areas of my life have taken on the characteristics that food once did. Just like the big bad wolf dresses up in grandma’s clothing, some of my latest habits are now just a new manifestation of what food used to be for me.
Let me get specific…
Prior to working on my relationship with food I used to consume as much information on diets, health and wellness as I possibly could. Hours would be spent pouring over the latest research, health blogging sites and recipes. In fact I owned every new diet and recipe book on the shelf, somehow believing that by just owning the books and reading the sites, I would magically turn into the people on the front cover, become the picture of ‘perfect health’ and turn into a chef extraordinaire.
Needless to say none of those things happened. I just became more and more anxious and more and more disconnected from what was truly right for me.
Nowadays I don’t consume recipes or health information like that (preferring to listen to my own intuition and taking a ‘less is more’ approach to cookbooks much to my families relief). But this hasn’t stopped my desire to control things at times or to fill up on other things.
The mediums have simply changed.
Now instead of endlessly consuming media on health and diets, I can consume media on coaching and personal development. I can binge on podcasts at an olympic rate, hungry to know as much as possible and to ‘fill up’ on as much information as I can.
This style of moving through the world makes me feel safe on some level. There’s some belief that if I just know EVERYTHING (no small feat), then I’ll be safe and secure.
Here are some other examples:
Now instead of looking for approval in regards to my weight, I sometimes seek it professionally.
Now instead of my personal development being all wrapped up in being the ‘perfect’ weight, I’m putting pressure on myself to be more ‘evolved’ in all this personal development s**t (This is something I can never ‘achieve’, as just like with my weight, as soon as I ‘get somewhere’ the goalposts move and there is a new destination to get to. Talk about exhausting, not to mention, futile.
Before, I used to be perfectionistic with food. Now I can be perfectionistic with parenting, personal development and how I’m showing up in the world.
I share all this because I think it’s fascinating how our habits can really give us insight into how we’re living our lives and what beliefs are driving us. While my relationship with food is completely different to what it once was, some of my old beliefs can still be found in different areas of my life. Dieting and controlling our weight is just a coping style and so it makes sense that these coping styles can merely change shape and form.
This isn’t disheartening, it just is. We’re all a ‘work in progress’ and so use these habits as a way to get curious about your deeper beliefs and eventually they’ll shift… and so will your life.
